Too many reminders of you
Tuesday, October 1, 2013 @ 11:57 AM
| 0 notesEleo,
I miss you.
Watched so many random videos today that kept making me think of you.
I don't know if this video would still be around when u see this post. But you know, it's about a father who has a daughter with down syndrome. And the thing I rmb the clearest about what he said was , "My greatest fear is that someone calls her retarded... or make fun of her in her presence. Then i'll have to explain society to her and build her self esteem back." this dragged me back to the time of me making the decision of keeping you with me or giving you up. Have I ever told you, that the reason I gave you up was because my grandma called you a bastard? It totally broke my heart. This memory tears my heart apart each time I think of it. But because of what she said, I told myself, I'd never ever let anyone call you that again. You're not what she said you are. You'd always always be preciously loved by mommy; Always until forever. I don't ever want anyone to have anything bad to say about you. You're just that precious to me.
This video was about a girl, in the doctor's waiting room, making that decision of abortion or keeping the baby. She rmbs the guy rejecting her because of the baby. She didn't know how to face her mom. But that little dream she had of her baby growing up, the smile, the joy that this little life in her would be, and she decided to escape the abortion clinic. I guess in the states, abortion happens so often that the doctors would say, "It's ok, you're still young. We've seen alot of this." I don't know... But baby, you know when I was in this state when tt guy just left, I really for awhile considered aborting you so he'd come back. I'm just thankful for my mommsy and my friends who'd support me and tell me to hang on. I'm thankful for all those support they gave me. Without them, I think.. no, I don't even know if you'd be alive today.
Baby, my heart's hurting so damn bad. To watch all this memories make me feel like I'm living through them again. But all these tears are good. They remind me you are real, and not a dream. I really really really don't want you to be just a memory. Live in my heart always? <3
Love you always.
Too many reminders of you
Tuesday, October 1, 2013 @ 11:57 AM
| 0 notesEleo,
I miss you.
Watched so many random videos today that kept making me think of you.
I don't know if this video would still be around when u see this post. But you know, it's about a father who has a daughter with down syndrome. And the thing I rmb the clearest about what he said was , "My greatest fear is that someone calls her retarded... or make fun of her in her presence. Then i'll have to explain society to her and build her self esteem back." this dragged me back to the time of me making the decision of keeping you with me or giving you up. Have I ever told you, that the reason I gave you up was because my grandma called you a bastard? It totally broke my heart. This memory tears my heart apart each time I think of it. But because of what she said, I told myself, I'd never ever let anyone call you that again. You're not what she said you are. You'd always always be preciously loved by mommy; Always until forever. I don't ever want anyone to have anything bad to say about you. You're just that precious to me.
This video was about a girl, in the doctor's waiting room, making that decision of abortion or keeping the baby. She rmbs the guy rejecting her because of the baby. She didn't know how to face her mom. But that little dream she had of her baby growing up, the smile, the joy that this little life in her would be, and she decided to escape the abortion clinic. I guess in the states, abortion happens so often that the doctors would say, "It's ok, you're still young. We've seen alot of this." I don't know... But baby, you know when I was in this state when tt guy just left, I really for awhile considered aborting you so he'd come back. I'm just thankful for my mommsy and my friends who'd support me and tell me to hang on. I'm thankful for all those support they gave me. Without them, I think.. no, I don't even know if you'd be alive today.
Baby, my heart's hurting so damn bad. To watch all this memories make me feel like I'm living through them again. But all these tears are good. They remind me you are real, and not a dream. I really really really don't want you to be just a memory. Live in my heart always? <3
Love you always.
